love ya lady

Emilius,
I used to be skeptical about how vividly a person who had passed on could stay in the mind of those that were still around.
You are with me everyday. Little things happen and I smile or laugh a little bit because it's like you are setting me up from up there. It's really hard for me to think about not having any more direct Em/Alicia time, no more pictures, no more inside jokes, that I can't call your cell when something reminds me of JERLI or exboyfriends or Foxridge/Village craziness. For a long time, I stopped thinking because it was upsetting. Everyday things happen and I know you are still present in my life. And I can't stop thinking about you. I'm sure it'll hurt for a long time (forever?) I hope you are setting up shop for all of us if/when we get to see you again (that's with hope that thoseVTgirls haven't already taken the greased pole...) I don't understand. I am starting to get the feeling that it's not about understanding. I'm trying for good times always when you are present recently. I think that's how it's supposed to be when you are around now. You know I'm not remotely religious but it helps so much to have a part of you around still. Love you always Em Spec.

Alicia